Wednesday, May 2, 2012

"Designing Woman"

Do you remember that TV show Designing Women?  Man I used to love that show when I was younger, ok a lot younger.  I really connected to it. 

I think a lot of it was that I am born and raised mostly in the South.  You just cannot get more southern than Mississippi.  I love it here I have to admit.  While I have lived all over the U.S this is the one place that I call home.  Things here really are slower and calm.  Sweet Tea is the drink of choice and it is very common to meet up with your friends on your front porch swing just sharing life. 

Southern expressions and colloquialisms are slowly dieing here and that makes me really sad!  Us Southern Women really have a way with coining a phrase and I thought I would share some of my favorites with you.  

Don't count your chickens until they hatch.

 He couldn't carry a tune if he had a bucket with a lid on it.

 It happened faster than a knife fight in a phone booth.

 I'm feeling as low as a toad in a dry well.

 Madder than a wet hen.

 Rode hard and put up wet.

 You ain't got the sense God gave an ant.

 I'll knock a knot on your head Oral Roberts cain't take off.

 I’m so southern I’m related to myself.

 Shit far (fire) and save the matches!

More nervous than a long-tail cat in a room full of rockin' chairs.
I'm older than I look, 'cause every time I did something wrong as a kid momma would knock me into next week.

Caint (can't) never could do a damn thing!

He's as crooked as a barrel of snakes.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink.

I'm sweatin like a whore in a church!

Now there is also a few simple truths that all Southerns should know:
The differences between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and trailer trash.
True Southerners know instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. (If the trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin'.)

True Southerners make friends standing in lines. We don't do "queues," we do "lines." And when we're in line, we talk to everybody.

Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it --- we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 on the freeway - you just say, "Bless her heart" and go your way.

Ya'll come back ya hear!


  1. This Carolina girl is far far away from the south now, and this was as lovely as an evening breeze to me. Thanks.

  2. You are funny! Im only as south as VA but this New Yorker is already appreciating the ways of you Southern folks. It takes some gettin used to though. i am having to learn to change my ways. I have a tendancy to get road rage and enjoy it, so I will try your advice about that. In NY we have a tendency to do things fast, but I noticed when I weave in and out of store aisles in an attempt to ge out of peoples way, they kinda look at it as rude. People here all yield and if by chance both move at the same time they tend to apologize and wave you through...that is so alien to me! I know, what you're thinking..go ahead call me a Yankee, it's okay - just don't call me a red sox!!